February 27, 2017

Mountainous Adventures


I have a saying in life  that I have  adjusted to social media  recently  called "mountainous adventures.". I like to use it to explain the wonderful, cool, or amazing things that I find myself doing every single day I have had since my lung transplant. Why do I bring this out so often?

I have found that a lot of transplant patients find pressure on themselves after their transplant to meet some kind of invisible standard. Specifically, an invisible standard of Awesomeness that they set upon themselves in order to be worthy of the transplant that they have received. It seems to me that this is of some kind of rite of passage to know and be comfortable with oneself after one's transplant. It's definitely a process of getting to know oneself again!  It takes some people longer than others to reach this point.



However, for me personally, I have found that to be worthy of my gift I don't have to climb any kind of mountains, run marathons, or invent some amazing product or cure. I don't have to make my mark and become famous in the world for some grand gesture. I simply have to be me - living my life in a way that shows appreciation and gratefulness for what I have received. In doing so, I can also bring awareness for the others that are still waiting to receive that gift. 

And along the way, I find the adventure in everyday life.

Yesterday, my niece and nephew discovered an actual mountain for me to climb! It was in the shape of a tube slide at the park. They wanted so badly for me to go in there with them! I wasn't entirely sure at first, but eventually I followed them inside that red hole to climb it from the bottom to the top! In the video I was taking on my phone you can hear I was completely out of breath -  this time, thought, it was not from a terrible end-stage lung disease, but from hilarious laughter! Pure fun and joy! It was a great moment, a great day. A Day to Remember. 




And that to me is living worthy of the gift that I have received. Living with joy, laughter, purpose, appreciation, gratefulness, love.

#mountainousadventures

Every single day. :)










Aunt Mia, Uncle Leland, Biscuit and Smoochie

Dear Fear

Dear Fear:

This is probably going to come as a shock but I'm cutting you off. I'm done with you. 

And guess what? It's not me - It's totally you!

I know you think we've got a rock solid relationship, built on time and shared experiences.  That's a nice thought, Fear, but it's false reasoning on both our parts. It's time to break free.

I know you've grown to be comfortable with me but I've never been comfortable with you. 

You're always there, getting in my way, annoying me, talking over me, whispering in my ear, and squandering my dreams. 

And today's the day we have The Talk. 

I am ending our relationship. 

You see, Fear, the thing is, you've become boring.  You and I, we've been together too long, I think. Remember how you used to come up with a lot of new and absurd things for me to be afraid of? But now its pretty much become predictable.  Some old thing, over and over. You know what you are Fear?  Boring, redundant, useless, and completely futile! 

I've made a decision. You are no longer going to be a part of my life. I'm not going to let you get in the way of what I want anymore.

Don't come around. Don't call me. Don't text. I'm even going to block you on social media - so don't try to internet stalk me either. 

It's over. It's so over. 

I cant have you impeding me anymore.  You've always been there, right in the way, slapping my hand from grabbing what I want, right when its in my reach.  Well I'm here to tell you, Mister, that I'm through with all that.  Your time is done.  Finished.  

And mine is about to begin.